51 Murphy's Laws for Combat Operations 1. Incoming fire has right of way. 2. If the enemy is in range so are you. 3. Don’t look conspicuous, it draws fire. 4. If it’s stupid and it works, it ain’t stupid. 5. When in doubt, empty your magazine. 6. The easy way is always mined. 7. Try to look important, as they may be low on ammo. 8. Teamwork is essential, it gives them somebody else to shoot at. 9. Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you. 10. Never share a weapon pit with anyone braver than you. 11. If your attack is really going well it’s an ambush. 12. No battle plan survives contact with the enemy. 13. Your weapon was made by the lowest bidder. 14. The only thing more accurate than enemy fire is friendly incoming fire. 15. When you have secured your area, don’t forget to tell the enemy. 16. Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you won’t be able to get out. 17. If your short on anything but the enemy, you’re in a combat zone. 18. The enemy invariably only attacks on two occasions, when you’re ready and when you’re not. 19. A sucking chest wound is nature’s way of telling you to slow down. 20. The important things are always simple. 21. The simple things are always hard. 22. Friendly fire - isn’t! 23. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection. 24. Beer maths is: 2 beers X 37 men = 49 cases. 25. Body count math is: 2 guerrillas + 1 portable + 2 pigs = 37 enemy KIA. 26. Things that must be together to work, usually aren’t shipped together. 27. Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately. 28. Tracers work both ways. 29. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take. 30. When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right. 31. Professional soldiers are predictable, it’s the amateurs that are dangerous. 32. If you can’t remember, the claymore is pointing at you. 33. Recoilless rifles aren’t. 34. If at first you don’t succeed, call in an air strike. 35. The enemy division you are ignoring is their main attack. 36. There is no such thing as a perfect plan. 37. 5 second fuses always burn for 3. 38. A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping. 39. Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially both. 40. Air defence motto: shoot em down, sort em out on the ground. 41. The one item you always need is in short supply. 42. The side with the simplest uniform wins. 43. Combat will occur between two adjoing maps. 44. The most dangerous thing in the army is a 2nd Lieutenant with a map and a compass. 45. One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many. 46. A clean and dry kit is an invitation for rain and mud. 47. Air strikes overshoot the target, artillery falls short. 48. Those who hesitate under fire usually don’t end up KIA or WIA. 49. The weapon that usually jams when you need it most is the M60. 50. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do. 51. Happiness is a belt-fed weapon.

The above laws have been extracted in part from: Murphy’s Law Site

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